The Car Is Cleaned, Their Bags Are Packed!!

October 30, 2009
filed under: Emmy, Fall 2009, Halloween, TOT

And tomorrow afternoon I send the kids with their dad for the afternoon/evening to see cousins and his side of their family at an annual Halloween party.  It seems that I am no longer welcome to attend functions from that part of my kids life, and oh well its their loss as far as I’m concerned.  In the past I was the driving factor to keep them talking, bugging him to call forcing him to attend the family gatherings.  Seems petty to me but oh well.

Best of all is about 8 hours all to myself, I am so waiting for that.  I’m not sure what I will do first, sleep, eat something on my own with out any interruptions and “Can I have some of that?”, work on school work, work on a blog, or just veg in front of the TV. I am just so happy that I am going to get the chance.  Now I love my children dearly, they are my life.  But I am solely responsible for them 360 days a year (add or subtract say 5 days for more accuracy).  He rarely takes them, and they spend a night or two with my parents from time to time but not with any regularity.  So this long of a break is very much appreciated by me.  I dislike seeing them go, but I need the break. Plus Emmy loves to see her cousins so its a win win situation.  Maybe I’ll just hide from 4:30 – 7 the TOT hours and munch that candy myself.

What Were They Thinking?

October 30, 2009
filed under: Emmy, Fall 2009, Teddy Bear Day

My kids go to a private Christian school, one in pre-school one in middle school(he’s been there since pre-school).  Therefore they do not do the Halloween party that most public schools tend to do, that was one of the best parties of the year from my elementary days.  So the elementary and pre-schoolers get to have a Teddy Bear Day, in honor of Theodore Roosevelt- who the Teddy Bear is named after.  Each child brings a bear to school and they bear stays with the kids through out the day.  The elementary school kids do different activities and I think have a party (its been 3 years since I’ve had a kid in elementary school so I’ve forgotten if they really do have a party or just do fun things the teach makes up).  But the pre-schoolers really have a fun day, they get a special snack and treats (brought in by the parents) they get to color bear pictures and do other arts and crafts based around the Bear theme.  They also come home with a lot of stuff, including some bubbles and (back to my What Were They Thinking?) a whistle with a Winnie the Po picture on both.  My 4 year old is running around the house directing traffic blowing on that darn whistle.  Oh I also am drowning in gummy bears.  But at least she was extremely happy when Matt and I got there, this is not the norm so we all were happy.

Emmy with her Bear and her whistle:

Gosh I really do love the smile, not the hair so much but the smile is priceless:

Because she asked for it, here is a picture of her Bear, Emmy Bear:

Never a Dull Moment Here

October 29, 2009
filed under: College, Divorce, Fall 2009

So this morning while at school finishing up a computer program due next week I ran into my teacher for that class.  We just had the last QBasic test yesterday, I knew that I scored a 98 on the test due to the grade being posted.  But what my teacher told me this morning is that I actually made the top score in the class, I don’t think I’ve ever had that honor before (I am not a good test taker at all, it took me 3 tries to pass a math test so that I could qualify for my BS in math many years ago) so this really was good news.

But then I had a blast from the past, it seems like my kids dad lost his job today, thankfully that won’t have too much of an impact here, since we’ve cut things down to almost no extras, and my parents have offered to help.  The only thing I need to do very quickly is get some insurance for the kids, I have 20 days left on Matt’s meds- we do not want to run out of those.  I hope for the best for their dad, but he’s made his choice to distance himself from me and the kids so he will need to lean on his new lady and his/their friends this time.  The last time this happened in ‘01 the day after Matt’s B-day party (11/5/01), he completely fell apart and things were really rough. I don’t wish anything bad on him, after all he is the father of my children but I do not plan on being sucked into any drama he might throw around- after all he is always the victim in every situation

Well I’m not sure about the kids but I’m ready for Christmas Break

October 27, 2009
filed under: Fall 2009, Tracy

Keeping up with both kids, my own school work and trying to keep the house at least presentable is defiantly starting to tucker me out.   To bad I just can not seem to get to bed before 11 each night, usually its Emmy who keeps me up, but once and awhile its Matt or a good book or I just can not get my brain to shut down.  Right now the almost month off after Dec 18th is looking really nice, there is a week off at Thanksgiving, but the kids still have their activities and school for Mon and Tues of that week.  Having them all the time with no break is also contributing to the exhaustion, but there is no other option for that, and let me tell you I have tried.  Thankfully they will be gone for the majority of Halloween, a bit bitter sweet but Emmy loves her cousins and since I am a person non grata over there I am very surprised and happy that they are actually getting to go. 

But what else is there to do but to keep plugging along. I am in a whole lot better shape than I was a year ago, more like a walking zombie then,  and for a long time before that things just were not good.  Now while everything falls onto me, I am at last finally starting to find me.  For 13 years I put everything into something that failed, a bitter pill to swallow, but once my feet are finally firmly on solid ground I will be so much happier.  I will have found me, and I must admit my humor is starting to rebound to what it was back almost 15-20 years  ago.  But then again that is not so surprising, because back then I was a college student trying to figure who I would be when I grew up, just like I am now.  Only now I have 2 kids along for the ride.

Not me Monday!!!!

October 26, 2009
filed under: Fall 2009, Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

This weekend I did not let my kids stay up way to late over at  my cousins as we adults talked, no I’m not starved for adult conversation at all.

I also did not let my precious 4 year old daughter pick a Halloween costume resembling anything like the Transformer Bumble Bee, she is going to be a nice pretty fairy princess instead.

I also did not let them stay up super late once again so that last Friday I could go to parent teacher conferences all on my own, not having to drag a 4 year old with me.  Then when I returned almost 3 hours later she was still asleep, but the teenage boy was at least awake playing video games (she slept past noon)